Welcome to the myth of either/or. There is a third way. It’s not that other things need 100% of our time and energy or we shut them out – it may be a 45-second hug, offering 5 minutes to see what your children want to show you, and then they move on and you move on to your thing. I also quote a study about distractions in this podcast as… Read More »The Third Way: Goodbye Either/Or, Hello “And” | #26
Inspired by the experience of a friend setting herself up to make a lot of different changes all at one time, I talk today about transitions and pacing yourself, including New Year’s Resolutions, and how to avoid Burnout when setting new goals for ourselves. || LINKS MENTIONED|| – Free Self Care Checklist Download – 5 Ways to Set Goals You Might Actually Accomplish – Grab yourself the FREE Roadmap to… Read More »Burnout: Pacing in The Boom and Bust Cycle | #25
One of the most common obstacles I hear from reinventors, is that of not having enough time. Now, to some extent, there may be a truth to how much free-time your specific situation allows you. You may be a carer or have two jobs in between meals and sleep: often the only pauses to breathe are those transitions between tasks. However, in many cases, this is a choice of prioritisation, where… Read More »How to Make Time out of Transitions
When we want to make a change, we essentially want to ‘learn’ something. Learning is considered a “permanent change in behaviour which occurs as a function of experience.” But there is a force working against us. Nope, not aliens. Nor Nazis. Nope, no Jedis here… In the human body there is a state called Homeostasis. In Greek, it literally means “Staying similar.” This mechanism is entirely devoted to keeping… Read More »Why Change Is So Damn Hard
When it comes to self development advice, we’re bombarded. One thread comments on the importance of setting actionable goals. Another strand emphasises the role of visualisation and acting ‘as if.’ A third route professes the strength behind gratitude and just letting things naturally form in their own way: finding the opportunities and just saying Yes. Today I want to talk about gratitude. It’s a big deal in the self-development and… Read More »Why Is Gratitude Such A Big Deal In The Self Help Realm?
Like many driven reinventors, I can’t focus on just one goal for a year or two; each of my goals is a strand I don’t intend to ever ‘finish’ just something to keep levelling up.
Ever heard of self-care described as self-parenting? It’s kind of true, isn’t it? I don’t currently have children, but I have a husband and two cats. [Sometimes, they can feel like children.] And I work with under-19s in my dayjob, so I’m not entirely oblivious. And with my pets, I set boundaries and hold expectations. I am their main carer; thus, it is my duty to ensure their basic… Read More »How to Improve Your Life Without Self-Discipline
So many reinventions are driven by a need for a fresh start, for being more adult, for a new, different, better self. But my proposition is that we keep our core style and then expand on it, instead of starting from scratch. Partly, this is because as a teenager / young adult I continually tried to make a brand new personality for myself, and it never stuck, never felt right,… Read More »Secret Weapon #1: Ready Your Armour
As a fiction writer, conversations with parts-of-myself feel a little less woo and more common than perhaps most people might find. If writing our conversations between two characters for a scene is ‘normal’ then writing out from “future, confident me” to “current, worried me” really isn’t so much of a stretch. I’ll begin with the cognitive side of the story. From the scientific side, journaling has a few benefits.… Read More »How To Talk *With* Your Fear