I spoke last time about how 2019 reduced me to a soup. Now that we’ve got that out of the way, I want to talk about my reinvention for 2020. We’re two weeks in, and things are plodding along at a steady (and manageable!) pace. My 2020 Goals Plan Essentially, I have 3 ‘life projects’ that are split into 14 tasks. However, before you narrow your eyes, and my mind… Read More »Reflection on the Year: Part II – My Goals
In 2011, I began picking a word of the year. I’d researched it in 2009, and picked one for 2010. It felt good to have a way to turn from goals to a reflection at the end of the months. But 2011 was when it all came together for me. This gave a new approach toward resolutions and goal-setting. I chose “Strength” and three particular facets: Mind, Body and Spirit. I… Read More »Reflection on the Year: Part I
Back in September, my business coach Michelle asked me to define how I wanted to feel, how I want people to feel after working with me. We spoke for a while, I did some reflection, but the very first word I came up with on that call was “steadfast.” I wasn’t quite sure how I got there, but there was this very clear message in my mind that this is… Read More »Word for 2020 — Steadfast
Delilah Dawson, whom I follow on twitter, had a set of tweets back in 2018 about being okay with emotional triggers and the thoughts which often follow them. On Being Okay She commented that when she is close to burnout, and does something which triggers her (certainly for me, triggers occur when I feel afraid, I am mentally taken back to a past negative event or a genuine sense of… Read More »Being Damn Fine as a Work in Progress
Although I no longer support people specifically with their mental health, one of the key lessons I picked up from teaching cognitive therapy tools was the differentiation between a Lapse and a Relapse; which is a concept that applies to any form of progress we’re looking to make. Let’s begin with some definitions. These are not necessarily the dictionary definitions, but they are how I have come to see progress… Read More »The Truth about Progress: Lapses and Relapses
When we want to make a change, we essentially want to ‘learn’ something. Learning is considered a “permanent change in behaviour which occurs as a function of experience.” But there is a force working against us. Nope, not aliens. Nor Nazis. Nope, no Jedis here… In the human body there is a state called Homeostasis. In Greek, it literally means “Staying similar.” This mechanism is entirely devoted to keeping… Read More »Why Change Is So Damn Hard
This afternoon I was at my desk typing some edits onto my manuscript. Smoke was resting his damaged hip, snoozing on a cardboard box. I heard the noise, one cat-owners have likely heard at some point, and slowly walked towards Ember, and her fresh pile of vomit. I told my friend I would be right back because she’d been sick, and my friend suggested I give her a cuddle. … Read More »How To See Brokenness Through The Eyes of a Fearful Cat
Ever heard of self-care described as self-parenting? It’s kind of true, isn’t it? I don’t currently have children, but I have a husband and two cats. [Sometimes, they can feel like children.] And I work with under-19s in my dayjob, so I’m not entirely oblivious. And with my pets, I set boundaries and hold expectations. I am their main carer; thus, it is my duty to ensure their basic… Read More »How to Improve Your Life Without Self-Discipline
Last week I walked into the bathroom, with its mottled brown tiled floor, and my foot just walked into an empty pint glass. My husband had left it just inside the door; either from finishing a drink or putting a spider out: I never did ask him… But my foot nudged it, and it fell. Somehow, it managed to entirely shatter across the whole floor. I was instantly pulled… Read More »Harness Your History: Broken Glass
Last week, Smoke fell off the garden fence. As far as I can tell, having heard the scuffle and physically carried him inside, he fell on his leg/hip and was scratched in the face by the neighbour’s cat. Whether this was one of his balance mistakes or he had been cornered, we’ll likely never know. He limped around, yowling a bit, and was restless for a few hours after; unable… Read More »How to Learn from the Cat’s Mistakes